Alas, poor Yorick. (Hamlet, Act 5, Sc. 1)
And by Yorick, I mean me.
I have a tale! For the ages, I am certain. Filled with Despair and Despondency, Discouragement and Desperation. I share it with you below, because we must Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak whispers the o-erfraught heart and bids it break. (Macbeth, Act 4, Scene 3)
When we at Romance on the Rocks first chose to celebrate The Bard of Avon during his birthday month, I thought, hey, letest me whippest upest a Top Five list. Those are popular AND fabulous for ye olde Search Engine Optimization.
Which was TOTES A THING in days of yore when they called it Scrutiny Instrument Maximization.
Okay, okay. That might be a reach.
All I can say is that Though I am not naturally honest, I am sometimes so by chance. (The Winter’s Tale, Act 4, Sc. 3) It’s possible this is NOT one of those chancy times…
Where was I? Ah, yes. Verily, I had arrived upon my Topic and possessed a heart replete with thankfulness! (Henry VI, Act 1, Sc. 1)
That was I did. Until the frothy, reeling-ripe giglet who answers to the name of Lori Ann Bailey dealt my valiant venture a vile, villainous coup de grace with her Fast Five post. Oh, woe is me. T’have seen what I have seen, see what I see! (Ophelia, Hamlet, Act 3, Sc. 1)
Even so, as any Shakespearean Scholar would be QUICK to point out: The miserable have no other medicine But only hope. (Measure for Measure, Act 3, Sc. 1)
Hence, I dragged my wretched soul, bruised with adversity (The Comedy of Errors) from the hard floor. Ha-ha! I muttered with vaulting ambition (Macbeth), I shall showcase our good playwright’s Mad Insult Skillz!
Surely, that would bring rich praise and many CLICKS and SHARES! (1609 Sonnets, sonnet 84)
But, oh, no Mr. Bill(iam Shakespeare)! The impertinent, tardy-gaited fustilarian otherwise called J. T. Bock swooped in with her favorite Bardian One-Liners and once again, my wits begin to turn! (King Lear, Act 3, Sc. 2)
What, what, shall I produce for our readers’ Delight and Distraction, Delectation and Diversion?
Reminded anew Tis no sin for a (wo)man to labor in her(his) vocation (Henry IV, Part 1, Act 1, Sc. 2) and that Good luck lies in odd numbers. (The Merry Wives of Windsor, Act 5, Sc. 1), I offer you this third-time’s-hopefully-the charm, short and sweet attempt at a blog post — a photo I took circa 2013 of William Shakespeare HANGING OUT like a LITERARY LION at the venerable Westminster Abbey.
What’s past is prologue (The Tempest, Act 2, Sc. 1) yet never let it be said I am unable to follow the maxim:
Brevity is the soul of wit. (Hamlet, Act 2, Sc. 2)
Hey – if you’d like to watch me being a goofball, I uploaded my first-ever video to YouTube reading this to you. You know, in case you simply *needed* to hear my fair voice lamenting my Shakespearean tale of woe.
Credit where credit is due:
I used this Shakespeare Insult Kit to poke fun at my Rocking Sisters.
I used this quote site for all the juicy bits and pieces of Bardian wisdom listed herein.
And though I can’t vouch for this show (yet) myself, Kelly Maher recommends Upstart Crow, a satirical sitcom about Shakespeare. It sounds awesome and made me think funny and risk a little fun with you today!